Note: the apostrophe above is placed correctly. This is not a guide for all Diamondbacks fans to follow, this is merely the guide for one fan, me. If you want to follow it, be my guest, but it’s a free country, and I don’t presume to tell you who you should and should not root for. Exercise your own freedom, just be warned that if you choose to root for the Dodgers, the rest of us will exercise our freedom to (at best) make fun of you.
Also note: I’m not sure how Bautista got that horizontal in that picture.